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Tuesday, 08 December 2009

  • Growing on Poems

    her heart is lost in the wilderness of the dark woods
    so dark that paths can not be seen

    Glimpses of light peer through the tall trees
    and in between, all she can see are shimmering stars glistening in the light sky
    Running through the misguided dark,  she holds her hands out for direction
    yet all she can find is this empty space leading her into nothing

    looking back upon the wonderous path,
    we question whether it was the right way to go
    we look ahead, and its just darkness
    yet we take that risk and just hope.

    - Florence


Monday, 07 December 2009

  • Haunting.

    Everyone has a past no matter if it was a good or a bad one. Yet its hard to forget it, and when the topic comes up, it just becomes all awkward and i dont want to reminded of anything of anyones past. Feelings of competition and the need to be better and as good as i can be for someone crops up. Those thoughts of their past haunts me still even if it was so long gone. Its haunting.I have nothing to worry about, but its all my insecurities and low levels of faith. its hard to pick out why my faith has slowly died and gone somewhere far, but all i want is to have it back safe in my heart. My levels of trust has been lost somewhere and i sometimes feel like im standing alone in the middle of no where. I have everything yet i cant see it all. I used be thrown into knowing 'what i had was everything i needed', but now, im left standing, maybe not so much alone, but somewhat far apart from people.

    i have to learn to stand back, look at the bigger picture and just love,cherish and love him some more. be the best that i can so nothing is lost.


    xX


Monday, 30 November 2009

  • Really?

    I often have doubts about whether i have changed or not. Have i really become cynical, serious & generally not fun? I feel my personality is outkasted in this place and often feel i can't truely speak to many people comfortably. Its not nice when you live in a place where you feel you can't talk to people the way you want to. My  personality has been been turned down, and my true self is not always here. I can't wait to be myself around my own friends again...speaking the way i like, talking openly and comfortably without feeling judged.

    Its gotten to the point where when i laugh with my friends , i actually get the thought of ''wow, this is good,hope this lasts a bit longer''. I shouldnt need to feel that, but thats what happens. When you see other people getting along better than you , its hard to not feel abit pushed aside. I would totally be lying if i said ''im not bothered''. In a way, i'm not bothered about these people here except for him because i know theyre not my true friends. But it shouldnt stop me from trying? I do try, but if they dont try either - whats the point?

    It's all like being back at school again. There are the groups of people that get on really well, and theres always one or two people who don't get on as well with anyone.



    xX

Friday, 27 November 2009

  • What if one day i went to sleep next to you and i decided to not wake up?
    what would happen? what feelings would that moment give you? rushing feelings of love,appreciation and hope?
    We should have those feelings everyday we're together.


    Could you ever breakaway from the one you love? Can you imagine your life without them? We live, laugh, play, work. We have feelings of hatred,love,anger,saddness. How can there be so many things you want to say, yet not manage to say it? We love so much that we don't want to hurt that person - even if it means you get those feelings of hardship, paranoia,anxiety & wonderings.

    We lie down and fall asleep next to the one we love.
    We just look into their eyes. Thoughts are scattered everywhere. Feelings from every corner of your mind is overtaking you. But love is the one that always wins the game.

Thursday, 19 November 2009